Dear Creepy Adults
I could list the reasons I don’t take time to blog often, but those are irrelevant anyhow. Today I had to write because, if not, the rage bees would consume me and I simply need to “speak”. This isn’t book-related. It is life related.
My mom claws are out…
Dear grown ups, stop being creepy to children!
Not just mine. ALL children.
Don’t touch my child. Unless there is a life or death situation happening, you have zero reason to have your flesh touching my child in any fashion. Seriously. I cannot stress this one enough. It’s not okay. Just no. NO!
Don’t offer my child candy or try to help him carry something. He’s strong enough to carry what he’s carrying on his own. I obviously trust him to do it, which is why I’m not carrying it for him. He doesn’t need candy. If he does, I have some at home, but I’d prefer him to have some fruit with me. Thanks.
Don’t ask him how his day was and what school he go to. You have no business knowing where that is unless you’re his teacher, and then you already know how his day went. He’s alive. His day is fantastic. Now move along.
Don’t ask him how old he is and what his favorite sport is. Again, if that’s your business, you were there for the sporting event and know that. Otherwise, what will those tidbits of info do for you? His age is irrelevant to you. His future is his own. What does a stranger need a child’s age for? It’s weird. Please stop.
Don’t force my son to stay at the door when he politely asks you to go away. If he has opened the door (after you’ve banged on the door and scared our animals), its simply to ask you to step away from our property before he hits the alarm and alerts the police you’re trespassing and a danger to him. We have a no soliciting sign. You’re breaking the law and being super gross. We don’t want what you’re selling. Our beliefs are firm and your pamphlets won’t assist that in any way. Manners don’t give you an “in” to force your opinion, point, or any other agenda. No means no. If my son has manners to say “thank you, but no thank you”, you need to turn and walk away. Saying anything other than that sends up every red flag ever and puts him on alert more than he already was.
Don’t tell my child that they have a pretty face or you like their jewelry. Neither of those things are relevant to you. Its nice to compliment someone, but save it for a fellow adult who needs a morale boost. My child is an amazing human who has great taste in the things he likes. He’s an individual and chose that. He knows its nice to him, the only one that matters in this scenario. His interests shouldn’t matter to you, but you have to deal with that. Please walk away and figure yourself out.
Don’t say that you once knew a kid that had that same necklace. Are you trying figure out where we went on vacation last? Where we go or have been, your taste in jewelry, your past and stories, etc have zero significance in his life. Walk away. For your own safety do so quickly.
Don’t offer my son a ride home. If he’s walking and alone, its because I’m watching from a distance (because I’m alive in 2015, have seen the world morph in front of my very horrified eyes, and don’t trust anyone). I see him and you. Its best if you simply drive or walk away before you cause my mother instincts to kick in. If, on the VERY rare occasion you catch him when I’m not watching (see: blue moon), its not “nice” of you to offer to “help” him. He’s not helpless. He’s heading somewhere specific and doesn’t know you. I’ve trusted him and am giving the world a chance to not disappoint me. Please don’t give me another reason to feel I need to overly shelter him. He’s already missing out on so much because the world is gross. Its not nice, its creepy. Stop it.
The world has changed into something I don’t recognize from when I was a child. I truly dislike that my sweet, caring, spirited child has been taught not to look people in the eye unless they are a teacher or someone his parents know personally. He’s trusting and kind, but has to force himself to be aware, on edge, careful, and safe in all instances. He should only be worrying about scraping his knee or making a proper spit-ball. So please, even if you are one of the good ones, just stop.
There are far too many people with a hidden agenda or negative intentions for us to appreciate your nice gestures anymore. I’m sorry, but that’s just how it is now.
I pray for all of us. There doesn’t seem to be a change for the better in the winds, but I’m realistic and understand that, so… don’t make yourself look creepy.
If you want to do good in the world, here’s a list of things you can do (merely suggestions, of course, you can add to this list at your leisure):
- Start a garden
- Donate food, clothes, and/or time to a homeless or abuse shelter
- Volunteer for Habitat for Humanity
- Pick up litter somewhere
- Visit a hospice or retirement home
- Leave a sticky note on a mirror to tell someone they are beautiful
- Place a note inside of a book at a bookstore or library to say hi to the next reader
- Read a book that inspires you
- Send food/letters/love/necessities to troops
- Hold a door open for a stranger (and don’t get cranky if they don’t thank you – do it for the deed)
- Learn CPR
- Aim to leave only positive/happy note/comments on social media
- Listen to mood-enhancing music (good for you is still a good deed)
- Buy coffee for the person behind you in line at your coffee shop of course
- Have more patience with other drivers – less road rage, the better
- Smile for no reason (it improves moods around you)
- Bake goodies for local first responders (cops, emts, firefighters, etc)
- Take snacks in to your local emergency room (those doctors and nurses work so hard and are hardly ever told “thank you”)
- Support your friend’s and family’s goals and dreams (donate, encourage, etc)
- Send a thank you note to someone or a business that you feel is worthy
- Thank people who serve you in any way (restaurant servers, mailman, trash people, etc)
- Leave what you think a persons hour+ is worth at a restaurant instead of calculating 15% and being greedy (they live off of that money)
- Go to your local police department and ask if there are any volunteer opportunities available
- Stop something you feel is a bad habit – nail biting, swearing, etc
- Exercise more
- Look up new recipes and try them out
- Share those recipes with your friends and family
- Plant a tree
- Volunteer at an animal shelter
Honestly, any random act of kindness that benefits life for anyone is acceptable. There are tons of ways not to be creepy. Be and do good. Its good for the soul and gives you lots of things to do. And gets your attention away from my kid, which saves your life.